1. The Epiphany/Little Christmas (January 6) is when Baby J’s dried and and knotted umbilical cord fell off, revealing his sacred little belly button.* The wisemen said “History shall promptly forget this day.” But they were wrong. The Italians celebrate by putting their shoes outside their houses in hopes of getting candied baby umbilical knots.
*His would become the most famous belly button ever, thanks to the immense popularity of crucifices! Never stop believing in YOU!